You're not being nice.

This post is dedicated to the three girls I met this summer, who gave me their phone numbers, and never answered when I called. Now, I realize this is an age old problem that I will not solve in a blogpost. Changing social behavior will take something on the level of sharia law- a power I have yet to obtain. Sometimes you just gotta vent.

Believe it or not ladies, you are not being nice. If a guy is flirting with you, and you're not interested, don't make him think otherwise. Don't give him your number if you're not planning on returning his call.

I realize that these things happen because you are trying to be nice. A lot of problems happen when we try to be nice. But a lot of what is called "being nice" is actually passive agressivity, a way of getting the upper hand.

Here's what you don't understand: it takes the average guy a lot of courage to approach a girl, and even more to try to get her number or ask her out. That courage doesn't come in endless supply. The next girl he meets, he'll drawing from a more shallow well. It gets harder and harder.

I'll always remember listening in on speaker phone to a friend in college as he asked a girl to join him for a cookout on a Sunday. Being a good Christian girl, her response was, "But Sunday's the Lord's Day!"

Now, honestly ladies, I know that when you give us your number (even when you don't want to) or you make an excuse (blaming it on God instead of saying "I won't go out with you) you think you are helping. But the fact is you are just making it harder. On everybody.

ADDENDUM
Since this post was originally written, the number has dropped from 3 to 2. The author would like to thank the young lady for doing her part to restore his faith in the opposite sex.