My reactions to "you're not being nice."

I've been overwhelmed by the reactions the Facebook version of my post "you're not being nice" has gotten. My response is as follows. First, on a personal note:

• It always blows me away that I put a lot of effort into posts about life, culture, and spirituality, and I get little or no feedback. One little post about girls and you all respond. I guess that says a lot about what's on my readers' mind.
• I am not heartbroken, upset, or desperate. I do not loose sleep because I haven't found the one. I just was sharing some thoughts that came to me after a day of waiting for a phone call. But thank you for your sympathy.

Now, in response to you, my faithful readers. Go back and read your responses, and see what they reveal about you. While there is a good amount of give and take, there are clearly some readers (some of whose responses have been deleted) who may have personal issues that make it more difficult to have meaningful relationships.

Let me share a few of my humble opinions on life. I'm not there yet, but here's some things that have helped me along the way.

1. You can't fix someone else, but you can work on yourself. The way I have handled this is surrounding myself with Christian mentors. I've also been in counseling for over 2 years, and it's one of the best decisions I ever made. Do whatever you can to surround yourself with people who have a broader vision, and will help you through life.
2. If you're a girl who doesn't give your number out, or doesn't return phone calls when you do, that's fine- just don't complain when you don't get asked out.
3. If you're a guy who's mad that he can't get a date- you are not trying. I know better than anyone that San Antonio is a terrible place to be a single 20something, I can STILL name half a dozen pretty girls in any age bracket waiting to be asked out. It's a numbers game. Just keep looking and asking.
4. Guys: Be prepared to be rejected. Regroup. Try again. Don't stop.
5. Girls: Take note from Hil, and be honest. I would have boundless respect for any girl who said "you've made my day, but i can't go out with you."

Finally: Trust God AND take initiative. Yeah, God will feed the sparrows, but he doesn't show up at their nest with a spoon and a can of Gerbers. It doesn't mean he's up in heaven playing relational chess with you and your future spouse. God is not your slave. You work for him, not vice versa. So go to work.

Go out. Flirt. Get phone numbers. Give phone numbers. Have a good time. And do it all in a way that will make God and your future spouse proud.